Shaking hands between men and women in Islam


 

Conclusion: In the case of shaking hand between men and women (male and female), majority of Ulama forbade it. But some scholars allowed it with some restrictions. This leniency has to be used in proper way. If muslim does not have to shake hand with opposite gender, then it better not to.

Explanation:

Alhamdulillah wa shalatu wa salam ala rasulillah. Amma ba’du,

The issue of shaking hand between male and female in Islam is one controversial issue between Islamic scholars and their followers. Especially for people who lives in minority muslim country, such guidance is needed. Because at some point, when other person tried to shake our hand, it will be awkward and embarrassing to let the other person’s hand hanging because we don’t want to. Not only that, but also in the term of relationship between workers and their boss this kind of simple action to not shake her/ his hand, can be a serious problem. 

The majority of Islamic scholars disallowed such action. In this case Syafiiyah, Malikiyah, and also contemporary scholar such as Ibnu Utsiamin held this opinion. Hanafiyan and Hanabilah according to Dar Ifta Misriyah, allowed it in some circumstances, such as to elderly women ho do not arouse desire

In this case, many arguments from Quran and hadith which support the first opinion. One of them is hadith narrated by Thabrani:

لأَنْ يُطْعَنَ فِي رَأْسِ رَجُلٍ بِمِخْيَطٍ مِنْ حَدِيدٍ خَيْرٌ لَهُ مِنْ أَنْ يَمَسَّ امْرَأَةً لا تَحِلُّ لَهُ

Meaning: It is better for him to be stabbed in the head with an iron stake than touching a woman who is not his mahram. (HR. Ath-Thabrani)

On the other hand, Yusuf al-Qardhawi and also Dar ifta mishriyah said, that this kind of action is permitted with certain restriction. According to Yusuf al-Qardhawi, Islamic scholar in this cased agreed about followed thing:

1.      It is haram to touch the opposite gender with the feeling of arousal/ desire and also causing slander/ defamation. Even tough at the principle touching our mahram is permitted, but when causing both (arousal and defamation) it turns to be haram.

2.      It is rukhsah (lightness) to touch the opposite gender who are elderly or child who do not cause arousal.

Other than both, it is still debatable, such as shaking hand to stranger women. So, in the case of shaking opposite gender’s hand, Yusuf al-Qardhawi through his research stated that, the cause of the unlawful shake hand between opposite gender is the feeling of arousal and safe from slandering (fitnah). So as long as the feeling does not exist, it is permitted. Al-Qardhawi also said, that if the person wants to shaking hand, it has to be because it was needed to shake hand and also just do it as quick as it need to be. Furthermore, Dar ifta’ mishriyah also allowed such case, especially for the muslim who lives in minority.

To conclude, although there are some scholars who allowed it, as muslim we have to be wise as possible. Meaning, this leniency is issued to be used properly. If the muslim does not need to shake hand, then it is wise to not do it just because some scholars permitted it. But if we have to shake the hand, then make sure our heart is safe from arousal feeling and may Allah forgive all our sin.

Wallahu a’lam bishshawab.

Refference:

1.      Yusuf al-Qardhawi, fatwa al-Mu’ashirah, Dar al-Qalam: Kuwait, volume 2, page 291.

2.      https://www.dar-alifta.org/Foreign/ViewFatwa.aspx?ID=9383

3.      https://islamqa.info/en/answers/21183/shaking-hands-with-a-non-mahram-woman

 

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